We welcome all reviews, but there’s a few things to note:

• Don’t be a troll; respect your fellow members or we’ll send the Danes after you
• Don’t post vegetarian propaganda; 99% of Instagram is for that (click here for the other 1%)
• Don’t swear too much; unless your steak was fucking brilliant
• Avoid politics; we’re not here to discuss executive orders unless there is one banning steak
• Avoid bias; if you’re reviewing your own steakhouse you’re very, very naughty
• Be original; your review should be in your own words and based on first hand experience